Depression is that feeling of gloom and doom or that feeling of hopelessness and uselessness that just hangs around and nags at us. It robs us of our energy and it causes us to feel like WHAT'S THE USE about anything. We say in abnormal psychology class at NEOBC that the depressed person is the GIVING UP PERSONALITY. Why do we say that? Because depression robs us of that energy and the commitment to go forward with our lives. So, what can we do?
First consider this! A number of things may cause depression. Let's consider a few of the big ones. Depression may be caused simply by negative thinking. That is, we see the dark side or the down side of everything instead of the possibilities and the excitement of going forward with things and with our lives for the Lord. But here is the big PROBLEM that causes depression. It is that thing or things that have passed us by. But what do you mean by that? Listen closely! What swims around in your mind most of the day? What thing occupies your mind? Say it more clearly! O.K. To what goals, aims, desires or wishes are you clinging? What is it that has passed you by and without it your life has passed you by and you can never have satisfaction or happiness because you missed your opportunity in life. To what hopelessness are you clinging. Is it that education you never received, or that other job or vocation that you should have taken, or is it that other person you should have married? Or is it the family or the home that you will never have? Just what is it? Again, what is it that has passed you by and now you can never, ever be happy?
Now, let's look at those things differently. Everyone of us has had opportunities, seasons, potential mates, jobs and vocations that we could have considered differently. But life and maturity requires that we let go of that PAST WISHFUL THINKING, and consider where we are right now. What we are required to do in order to become mature is to both face and accept life where we are today, and not to cling to the past. We have to let it go. But how do I do that? Romans 12:2 says that we become changed people by the renewing of our minds. Therefore, in order to help ourselves we must do this. Each time the nagging thoughts of the past enter our minds we must make the conscious effort to renew our minds. We must think, That is the past and the present requires me to focus on the here and now. So here I am, and I will focus on today and make the best of it. Make plans to go forward and concentrate or the present and the future. Commit to the Lord your ways and decide that those ways will be to go forward for Him and His Kingdom. After all, that is why I am here, to serve Him. And He can overcome for me anything that I have missed in the past; He can and will make me sufficient. I just have to stay focused upon Him and what He can do with me and through me. So am I willing to do that for Him and to really, really let go of the past and the wasted time by thinking about today and going forward with Him concerning my life and the service that I can render to Him?
What else can I do? Forgive yourself for mistakes in the past and forgive anyone whom you think may have held you back. Come out of retirement from the negative thinking and realize that God is so powerful and so full of wisdom that He can use anybody at any level if only he or she will let go of the past and step out and trust Him. Begin to educate yourself for greater and grander service for God. Take small steps by volunteering at Church and doing those jobs faithfully. Then, once proving your faithfulness, graduate to even greater service for Him and show yourselves faithful to those commitments. That's what you can do. So pray, seek wise counsel about both the time you have available and your ability level for now and get involved as you educate yourself for more exciting works to come. - Don Cooper
What is faith anyway? How do we attain it? Do we pray for it, or feel in our minds that we need to be better and better persons before we can attain a greater degree of faith? What is the answer?
Faith is the acceptance of testimony. What in the world is that? Well, the testimony to what we refer is the Bible. Faith, as Alexander Campbell said, is the acceptance of that testimony, or the acceptance of scripture. Romans 10:17 says, So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ. That means that I have to hear the word and then contemplate it over and over again to understand it.
Or, let the Lord say it Himself. Please note John 17:20, concerning what Jesus said. I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word. What is Jesus saying? He is saying He not only asks something from God for the disciples alone, but for all the ones in the world who will believe on Him. But how will they believe? How does this faith come? Jesus answers it right there. These people will believe on Him by or through the words that these eleven men speak. They will believe on Me, Jesus says, through the words that the apostles speak.
There are other scriptures that exclaim the same thing. For instance, please note I Corinthians 3: 5 What then is Apollos? And what is Paul? Servants through whom you believed even as the Lord gave opportunity to each one? There Paul is saying that the Corinthians obtained faith from the words that Apollos and he taught them. So then, faith comes by hearing and studying and contemplating the word of God. And that is why Paul says in Romans 10:14, How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have not heard? And how will they hear without a preacher? And in verse fifteen Paul says, How will they preach unless they are sent? Just as it is written, HOW BEAUTIFUL ARE THE FEET OF THOSE WHO BRING GOOD NEWS OF GOOD THINGS!
So here is my answer; faith comes from hearing and studying the word. I don't know how many times I have heard it said on the radio or television that if you lack faith, then pray for it. But that is not the entire answer. If I lack faith I MUST also study the Word of God. Therefore, I am in control of just how much faith I want to have. It is within my grasp. - Don Cooper
Have you ever been hurt? If you are reading this then you are a person who has experienced some hurt in your life. Often when we have been hurt we just stay in our hurt, experiencing the hurt and pain over and over again. We want to bring an end to the pain, but we don't know how. There is a way out - a very clear, Biblical answer as to how to deal with this problem.
Under all hurt there is anger, or you may call it frustration or aggravation. Many of us do not recognize or admit our anger because we are afraid if we did we do not know what it would cause us to do. Anger causes three things. One, anger will keep you in your hurt. You will experience the emotional pain every day and it will rob you of much of your energy and happiness. Secondly, that anger will cause you to develop an attitude. That attitude may be a desire to take revenge or strike out at the person who has hurt you, or you may want to retreat from that person and not have anything to do with them. Another way the anger may affect you is by your going numb and you may stay in this numbness because no one can hurt you when you are numb. Numbness comes from feeling two opposite emotions about the same person, resulting in those emotions colliding and canceling each other out. For instance, you may love someone deeply but you are so angry with the person because of the way he or she has hurt you. Those two feelings can easily come together and cancel one another out and you go numb. And when you are numb you feel you are safe because no one can hurt you while you are in that state of numbness. The third big thing anger causes is that you may want to project your anger out towards others, but instead, you turn it in on yourself. Why? Because if you let go of your anger you don't know if you will be able to control yourself, so you turn it in on yourself and anger turned inward ends up in the form of depression.
So there it is, your anger causes you to stay in your hurt, to develop an attitude and it may also cause you to become very depressed. There is only one thing you can work on in that whole mess and that is the anger. Desensitizing yourself to the hurt and anger is not the answer. Displacing the anger on a punching bag or stomping up and down the stairs will not do it either; nor will driving down the road at ninety miles per hour. We are clearly given the answer as to what to do with our anger when God, in His Word, tells us to forgive it. When I say this you may think the only thing God cares about is letting the person who hurt you off the hook, but that is not correct. That person still has to answer to God, but God cares about healing you. God designed forgiveness to heal you. Since God made you and loves you and knows what is best for you, why wouldn't you want to do what He says? God says to forgive those who have hurt you so you can heal and experience more energy and joy in life.
When you choose to forgive, you let go of the debt that the person who wronged you owes you and the following chain of events occurs. Forgiveness melts the anger that is keeping your hurt alive as well as fostering your attitude and fueling your depression. God designed forgiveness in order to melt your anger so that you may heal from your hurt, your attitudes and your depression. These are some of the tremendous blessings God pours out on us when we are obedient to Him and are willing to forgive. However, when you first begin the forgiveness process you sometimes get worse. Why? Because you begin to become aware of all the hurt and pain you have been repressing. Hurtful things you haven't thought about in years may begin to surface. This is God's way of bringing up the past so you can now deal with it in the correct way. How is that? Make what I sometimes jokingly call a "hit list" - make a list of all those people who have hurt you, but then turn that hit list into a forgiveness list.
How do you go about forgiving a person? You forgive by saying the words. You say to yourself and to the Lord, I forgive... This creates cognitive dissonance. What is cognitive dissonance? It means there is a difference between what you are saying and what you are feeling. And as you continue to say you forgive a person, eventually you will begin to feel release from all that hurt and pain that he or she has caused you. You are releasing or letting go of the tremendous debt that person owes you.
How much or how often should you forgive? you may ask. Seventy times seven, Jesus said. Pain and hurt go so deep that you may spend months forgiving others. So forgive everyday. You may say, What if I say I forgive someone but don't feel like it, am I then being a hypocrite? No, you do things everyday that you may not feel like doing, but they are necessary to do. One example is going to work. Are you excited about going to work everyday? No, but you choose to go anyway because it is necessary. It is necessary for us to forgive, because God commands it and it heals us.
Forgiveness is a serious thing to contemplate. We need to remember that in the model prayer (Matthew 6) we are instructed to pray that God will forgive us as we forgive others - meaning forgive us as much as we are willing to forgive others and no more. Jesus tells us how important it is for us to forgive when He gives His own commentary at the end of the prayer. There we see that forgiveness is conditional. If we are not willing to forgive, then God will not forgive us.
So, do you want to heal from all the hurt and pain that you have experienced in the past? It is up to you to begin the process. Make that forgiveness list and begin to forgive each one and keep doing it until the pain subsides. And remember, this is God's way of healing you so that you may experience that abundant life that He says is available for you.
One final note: can you guess the most difficult person to forgive? You got it; YOU are that person. You may ask, How do I forgive myself? You say the words - over and over again - for months or longer if need be - until you feel release from that particular situation. If you really want to heal, it is up to you; God has given you the answer. - Don Cooper
When we hear the word piety it seems as though it's just another one of those religious words preachers throw around that seem so mystical and illusive that they are beyond comprehension. Well let's take a look at the word and see how much we really can understand about it. One aspect of the word piety means that we have an intimate relationship with our heavenly Father. But how does that relationship develop? Consider this, if any of us wants to grow in any relationship one thing we must do is communicate. We must share our thoughts and feelings with the other person. For instance, a husband and wife do not grow in a relationship unless they take time to do things together and to communicate. However, so often we only talk about those subjects that are so very safe, such as the weather or the house.
But what are we saying when we choose to only talk about those safe areas? We stay on those subjects because we do not want to talk about our feelings and our innermost thoughts. Those thoughts are too threatening since we may unveil ourselves and expose ourselves. We men especially will not talk about our feelings because we think it is too unmanly to do so, and we have never been taught to talk about them. We just stuff all those feelings down inside ourselves so that we do not look weak or vulnerable. And talking about the weather is much safer, isn't it.
To grow in a relationship we must take the risk of opening up and sharing ourselves. We must share what we really think. We must take that risk even if it means that we may look both weak and vulnerable. But we just will not do that because it is too exposing and too risky, so we play the games of life, Well, do you think it will rain today? Ah, it might; you never know about the weather. Yes, it's so safe isn't it? After all, we don't cause the rain, do we?
That is what we often do with God. We play it safe with Him. Bless those missionaries and the church and the members; well God, just bless them all, Amen. What about mentioning, God, I am so out of touch with you; I am not right with You, and many times I don't even have the energy or the concern to work on making things right with You. What about a prayer like that? Do we see the point? Piety is a deep intimate relationship with our Father. That means we have to communicate to Him, and be real, open, and honest with Him about our thoughts and feelings. Besides, He already knows them anyway, but we need to communicate them to Him in order to grow closer to Him. Here is the secret; we communicate to God through prayer and He communicates back to us through His Word. That is the secret; prayer and Bible study. The Bible is sixty-six books of the mind of the living God. And the beauty of it all is that we are directly in control of just how close we want to be with God. Yes, the answer is communication. We talk to Him through prayer, and He talks to us through His Word. Therefore, I am directly in control of how close and how intimate I want to be with God.
May we summarize by saying if we want to be close to someone we have to communicate to that person regularly; we must be both honest and open, and we must be the very same way with God. He loves us so much and desires a deep, intimate relationship with us. - Don Cooper
Some elements of society would have us believe that men are rather useless and unnecessary in the family. What about that? Are they right or is the opposite actually true? To answer that question we must first examine factors that happen to young people as they individuate.
At about the age of twelve or thirteen, sometimes earlier or later, young people begin to individuate. That means that they begin to see themselves as an individual. They also see themselves as separated from the family. They desire to spend less time with family activities and more time alone or time with their peers (young people their own ages). During this time young men begin to tune out women. Men become more important to them for many reasons. One is male modeling. These young men are watching dad, or they are watching a coach or high school teacher and are identifying and maybe even internalizing from these men - they are making the teacher's values and philosophies, etc. their own. Since this process is true the Church would want to see that they have plenty of men involved in the leadership and programs of the Church, or the young men will view the Church as a place run by women. And remember, we just said that these young men are tuning out adult women at this stage in development. Again, what is the reason? Young men need adult men in their lives to provide male modeling in order to know how to grow, how to act and conduct themselves as men and to learn how to cope with life as a man. These are a few factors among many that we can mention as to the tremendous importance of the father in the family.
But what about the young ladies? Do they need Dad? Some in society say no, but are they right? NOT AT ALL. Young ladies, from childhood up, need men and especially Dad involved in their lives. What is the reason for this? Young ladies receive from Dad both their confidence and their competence to function in a world that is full of not only women but men as well when it comes to the many facets of life. Not to have this confidence and competence which they derive from fathers, and older men who take the time to appreciate them, these young ladies may doubt their own abilities to function well in life.
So, men, especially Christian men, what should you do? Become involved in the lives of young people, but especially in the lives of your children and teenagers. Have a men's night out. Go to a place and have a meal with the young men in the family. Then take in a sporting event together, or if Wednesday evening, head to Wednesday night Church. Plan a time on Saturdays once per month to spend a few hours with your sons. Every now and then have them to invite a male friend or two along who has no good role model in his life.
What about your daughters? Have a Dad and daughters' night out. Let them say, within reason, where they want to eat and how they wish to dress. Naturally this must fit within your budget, but just do it. Daughters need their Dad involved in their lives. While out, ask them about themselves and let them talk. And remember, one of the most important gifts that you can give to you child is your time.
Dads, God has blessed you with your children and He wants to use you to help shape and mold them into His image. - Don Cooper
If we really want to be like Christ then one of the things that we must do is to add the Fruit of the Spirit to our lives. How is that done we may ask? Do we just pray for it and ask God to dump it all into our heads? No, that is not the answer. Then how is it done? How do we obtain those beautiful items that make us more like Christ. The answer follows so contemplate it closely.
In Galatians 5:22 and 23 Paul lists the Fruit of the Spirit for us. Please note that fruit is singular. These fruit seem to be gifts sitting upon a shelf; we just need to take a jar of love or joy down off the shelf and pour it into our minds or brains. Then we will be full of love or joy. And what about patience? Well, we will just pour it into our brain so we will have patience and have it now, right now. How about that!
Sorry, but it does not work that way. Please: go to II Peter 1:5-7. Note carefully what it says there; it says to supply to your life. Some translations say, add. That word could be understood as lavish; lavish upon ourselves these fruits. That word has a tremendous history. The ancient world loved acting and singing upon the stage. Thus the ancients sent talent scouts all over the known world in order to search for these talented people. When talented people were found they were lavished with gifts in order to entice them to return to their country to perform. Once there the ancients would lavish gifts upon them in order to keep them. That is the very word that Peter uses. We are to lavish this fruit of the Spirit upon ourselves.
How is that done we may ask? The process of obtaining the fruit of the Spirit is accomplished in this way. The best place to learn to love is in very unloving situations. We must determine or choose to practice love in each situation. And the best way to learn patience is to practice it in impatient situations. We make a commitment and choose or determine to practice patience. Thus, we see that the beautiful fruit of the Spirit is learned, and it is learned by practicing it. And may we understand that one of the main parts of the power of God is already in us. We call it determination. Please note that in I Peter 2:22 and following, when Jesus was reviled what did He do? He determined or purposed in His heart not to revile in return, but committed His mind or heart to God to focus on how God would want Him to act in every situation, even the death of the cross.
So, what about it? Can we determine in our hearts to practice these fruit? Are we willing enough to become more like Jesus. We know the plan of salvation, but are we aware that once a Christian we are now to grow into the maturity of Christ Himself? Or are we like those people who have claimed to be of Christ, but we can't see any difference between them and the world. We have seen some of the worst attitudes portrayed by Christians in our churches, at congregational dinners and even at leadership meetings. We have been baptized but not much else has changed over the years. Let us think about it; one of the most important things we need to be accomplishing is growing into the likeness of Christ by choosing to add to our lives daily the beautiful fruit of the Spirit. - Don Cooper
Bible is 66 books of the mind of God, what He has chosen to reveal to us.
Chosen is a word that is so confusing since so much teaching about it has led us astray. Originally, chosen ones or chosen of God was a way that the New Testament expressed and identified those who had accepted the Gospel. Note II Thessalonians 2:13-14 But note it carefully. But we should always give thanks to God for you, brethren, beloved by the Lord, because God has chosen you from the beginning for salvation through sanctification by the Spirit and faith in the truth. Now note verse 14 carefully, very carefully : It was for this He called you through our gospel, that you may gain the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ. They were called by the preaching of the Gospel; they had to hear it and accept it. So they heard the Gospel preached to them, they accepted it and they were then called the chosen of God.
Christ means the Anointed of God or the Messiah
Faith means the acceptance of testimony. The testimony is the Bible. We have to read it and examine it in order to have faith, Acts 17:11, Note Romans 10:17, So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the word of Christ. Note John 17:20, I do not ask on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word. What is He saying here? Jesus prays for all those people who will believe on Him by the preaching and teaching of the apostles. These people will come to believe in Jesus by hearing the Word of God or Word of Christ as it is both preached and taught. Note I Cor. 3:5, What then is Apollos? And what is Paul? Servants through whom you believed, even as the Lord gave opportunity to each one. So the way that the Corinthians came to believe was that they heard Paul and Apollos preach and teach. faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God. This is the most elementary definition of faith. Faith may stand for doctrine, etc.
The Fruit of the Spirit is listed in Galatians 5: 22-23. There they sound like gifts that God gives to us and rightly so. But please note II Peter 1: 5-7. There we see that we need to take the Fruit and apply or add it to our lives. How, you may ask? By purposefully being a loving person in an unlovely situation; by being patient in a very impatient situation, etc. God is saying I have given you the Bible; I gave you your brain or mind, now use it. You build character when you practice these things. Please note verse five carefully: add or supply or apply these items to yourself, to your life. In other words the best time to use and practice each fruit is when you are in situations that the very opposite of that fruit is being expressed. Just make up your mind that you are going to act and think the way God wants you to in every situation.
Gospel means good news or good message. The Anglo Saxons translated the Greek word euaggelion into god-spil or good-story. Gospel means good news, or good story. Gospel is the good news about Jesus Christ
Grace means unmerited, unearned or undeserved favor. Grace is God helping me in a way that it was utterly impossible for me to help myself.
Hope is a futuristic expectation. It is something that is coming is the future and I know that it is coming because of God's promises. It is a reality expected in the future.
Joy in Philippians is an attitude. The attitude is being deeply satisfied with Jesus. When I think of what all He has done for me, presently does and will do in the future, then I become deeply satisfied with Jesus. In general, joy can be my satisfaction and my being pleased with God and all that He does.
Justification means being made right by God. He is the One who wipes our slate clean. He is the One who forgives us our sins at baptism: Acts 2:38; Acts 22:16, etc. To be made right or righteous is the same as being justified. We obey and God makes us righteous or He justifies us. He makes us Just. Our sin is removed.
Lord means God. When Moses said in Exodus 3: 14, whom shall I say sent me, God said to answer, I am that I am. That is the name of God. When the Hebrew Bible was translated into the Greek, the Septuagint, the name of God was translated KURIOS. In English that word is LORD. When Jesus was called Lord in the first century every Christian knew that the New Testament writers were calling Him God. He is God the Son, the Son of God, the second Person of the Godhead.
Loveis thinking the best and doing the best for everyone. It is not an emotion but includes emotion or affect. Once one thinks and does the best over and over again feeling can come and even return. Couples who claim that they have fallen out of love can begin to think the best and keep doing the best for each other and feeling can return. Love is a decision that I make; I choose to love my wife or people of the world. Love is a choice; it is something that I choose to do.
Meeknessis being under control. A meek person is one who can keep his temper and can control his attitudes. He remains calmly under control at all times.
.Truth means the reality of God. It means that which is real, or it means reality. God's Word is real; you can trust it. God is the only One Who can back up totally what He says that He will do.